I've never been good at goodbye

In the wee hours of this morning I find myself thinking about silence and the space it provides for the voices of the soul to speak.

This morning a quote from a movie emerges from my thoughts. It's from one of the most moving scenes I've ever watched--a scene from Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey. Yes, those animal movies will get you every time! The two dogs and cat are making their journey across the landscape trying to get back to their human family. As they are crossing a train yard Shadow, the wise, old Golden Retriever, falls into a hole and injures his leg. He is unable to climb back up out from the hole. Chance, the young, exuberant American Bulldog, encourages him to not give up now! But, Shadow is just too old and now he is injured--it looks like he's not going to make it up out of the slippery sides of the hole he is now trapped in.

Shadow then imparts to the young Chance some of the most insightful words of wisdom I've ever heard:

"You've learned all you need to know, Chance. Now all you need to learn is how to say goodbye."

It's a heart-wrenching scene--I sobbed upon hearing these words. I've always hated goodbyes! But in spite of my tears I recognized how profound and graceful Shadow's words were.

Of course, that scene makes the ending of the movie all the more moving as we discover that Shadow does miraculously escape from the hole and still makes his way home to rejoin the family just a half-second after they've all had the realization that he wasn't able to survive the journey. Yep--you guessed it--more tears for me! I have no shame in being moved--even by a Disney movie!

Goodbyes, hellos, tears of grief, tears of joy....sometimes they are all so intricately intertwined. I'm feeling a lot of that these days. I've always been gifted and being able to laugh and cry simultaneously--I think both are important if one wishes to experience the very fullness of life. I'm wrestling with what it all means for me. The deepest joys often bring that very same depth of grief--this doesn't seem like a very fair trade-off. Shall I then seek a life that is more shallow so that it might not hurt as much? Of course that's a ridiculous notion to me, but the argument does have its merits!

I found this video clip while searching for the scene I described above. While it's not exactly what I was originally looking for, I wept upon encountering it and felt moved to include it here. Even in our goodbyes we are never really alone. And sometimes goodbyes aren't really "goodbye"....but just "see you in a little bit."